Sunday, August 29, 2010

Working Out

As a chubby kid in the 60's my workouts were recess, riding a bike and playing in the woods. I went on to HS fulfilling my gym requirements with no interest in the things I was doing to achieve this goal. It was not until after HS that I became an athlete.

It started with bike rides with my girlfriends that spanned so many miles. In early 1978, a wife for less than a month and living in a new place I decided it was time to run. Prior to this time all required running had relegated me to a last place position. Don't know why this happened, my hero Jim Fixx came later. I started slowly through our apartment complex, probably a half a mile each day. By that Spring I was up to three miles a day.

In the six years that followed I got up in the wee hours of the morning to log in ten miles before I went to work. I was out there when there was snow on the ground. I was addicted. Through these years I ran in a 10K every weekend and actually won races. Running became something other than what I needed to do to something I had to do. Vacations and holidays were never a reason to miss a day. It was like a drug and it did lead to harder drugs. Aerobics classes, Jazzercise and any other way I could pound my twenty something knees and feet to death were just a way of life.

I first became pregnant at age 30, although I kept running through the first months, it became evident that I had to slow down. I credit my being in shape to immediately losing the weight after my first child. Then came a move to a new state and a second child. Running became impossible because I couldn't leave two babies to go out and run. Exercise classes were the answer because there was a nursery and a woman, who is still a dear friend, who I trusted to take care of my kids.

Then came another state to state move just at the beginning of my "Soccer Mom" years. Workouts became harder to achieve but I continued with some regularity. This was only possible because then I was a stay at home Mom. Then as the economy began to tank and our dream of putting these kids through college with no debt did I go back to work. I must say these working years were wonderful and exciting. Wouldn't have changed a thing, but as I stayed in a hotels with a gyms, working out was the last thing I wanted to do. I was relegated to walking through my neighborhood sometimes. Seven or so years ago was the last time I tried to run. On a morning walk through my streets I decided to run with a much younger neighbor to show my stuff. The next morning I fell out of bed as my knees were shot.

What followed was the idea that my running days were over, bad feet and knees, not to mention the lack of time or ambition to do it. Then I was laid off with no job prospects. Fortunately, this did not bring on my doom. I became a "Stay at Home" Mom again to one married and one starting a new career, both college grads and not living in our home. I had the time again.

Started slowly as I was so fat. Weighed more than I did when I was rolled into the hospital to give birth to each of my children. My New Year's resolution 2010 was to again make exercise a way of life. I started on the track at the YMCA and I was humiliated so many times as people 15 to 20 years my senior lapped me. Keep in mind that these people are AARP card carrying senior citizens. Armed with my new Ipod and "shape up" shoes I was determined to make this happen.

It is nine months later and I am hooked again. My feet and knees will prevent me from ever doing a 10K again but if it kills me, I will run a 5K again. Exercise is again something that I miss for even a day. I'm riding a bike again after almost twenty years. It has been years since I have felt as good as I do now. "Baby I Was Born To Run".

Friday, August 27, 2010

Quirks

I know that there are those out there with some very serious quirks which produce dire consequences. Addictions, horrible issues and inner demons to name a few. I am blessed to have none of these but I have some quirks that people would consider not quite normal in the scheme of things......

*I will not eat chicken or turkey but have no problem with a can of sardines.

*I know the birth date of anyone I have ever known. I have account numbers, phone numbers, passwords, etc. stored in my cranial data base but could not begin to tell you the letters and numbers on the license plate of my car.

*I have a horrible fear of the number 13 even though my Daughter, Mother, Brother and Sister-In-Law were born on the 13th day of a month.

*I live in a very musical home but the only songs I know all the words to are "Happy Birthday", "Jesus Loves Me" and "Old Time Rock and Roll".

*I first tasted coffee thirty five years ago and have not touched a drop since.

*I once got 72 sticks of gum in my mouth on a bet.

*I can put my entire fist in my mouth.

*I have never eaten a peanut butter/jelly sandwich.

*I have never eaten any sandwich in which loaf bread was involved.

*I didn't eat tomatoes until adulthood because as a child I heard an Uncle comment that someone was emptying a septic tank and it was full of tomato plants.

*My favorite pair of gym shorts are ones that my 22 year old daughter put in the Goodwill bag when she was 15.

*I was never on an airplane until I was 30 but can't count the times I've been on one since.

*I throw away junk mail and recycle newspapers everyday.

*I will eat a pack of crackers rather than prepare a healthy meal for myself, but I love cooking for crowds.

*I was never an athletic child, but in my twenties ran ten miles a day and won races.

*I would rather visit LA than any tropical paradise.

*I never saw "Friends" when it had its run, but have seen every episode ten times or more since. Same goes for "Seinfeld".

*I don't have a passport.

*I love going to the movies and I wouldn't consider watching one without popcorn, Diet Coke and peanut M&Ms.

*I consider popcorn a meal as I have since childhood.

*I would rather see a six foot black snake in my pantry than a tiny mouse.

*I worry when I break a mirror or a black cat crosses my path. I will never walk under a ladder or open an umbrella in the house.

*I will only use a public or private restroom in extreme emergencies. I once spent a weekend at Girl Scout camp and didn't go at all.

*A year ago I didn't have a Ipod, but now I couldn't survive a day without it.

*I used to have my nose in book, but now listen to them all on audio while alone in my car.

I suppose there are so many others and I know that there are those of you out there who have some of your own. Quirks only make us more interesting.

Saturday, August 21, 2010

Cleaning the House

While on Facebook tonight, I read posts from so many FEMALE friends and they were all talking about cleaning the house. I have never had a MALE friend who posted something like that. Why? Because the women still do the cleaning. Is there a male version of the word "maid"?

I know that men clean and do it very well, but when you are married or in a relationship the job falls to the woman. Of course, this is just in my life and, again, I know that there are those "cleaning" men I don't know about. The men I know who clean and do it right are Gay or the extreme metro-sexual. I am not complaining about this at all because I truly think this is the way God separated the sexes. I don't know many women who can change oil in a car or a tire. I truly can't think of another way the sexes are so divided. Men are great chefs and women are great financial planners.

Again, tonight, a friend refered to her two adult sons and how one cleaned like a girl. Cleaning like a girl? Here are a some ways to know if you or ones you love cleans like a girl.

A girl doesn't just dust the furniture, she picks up photo frames and accessory decor and dusts them too.

A girl doesn't just vacuum the high traffic areas. She vacuums under the couch cushions and under anything else.

A girl doesn't clean the lid of the toilet bowl. She goes under the rim.

A girl cleans and shines mirrors.

A girl knows that the refrigerator needs to be periodically cleaned out, washed and wiped.

A girl knows that the same thing goes for the washer/dryer, stove, microwave and dishwasher.

A girl knows that fairies don't change the sheets on the bed. She also knows that mattresses need to be vacuumed and their pads need to be washed.

A girl knows that a pillow doesn't last forever.

A girl knows that food has expiration dates and throws away things before they look disgusting.

A girl knows that dust accumulates on ceiling fans and light fixtures.

A girl will mop the floor before it gets sticky.

A girl knows that "doing laundry" goes beyond putting clothes into the washer and then the dryer.

A girl knows that when you buy something new you should throw something old away.

A girl knows about bleach, fabric softener and dryer sheets.

A girl knows that if you can't see dust, it is there.


A girl cleaner can be both male or female. The "girls" just do it right.

Wednesday, August 18, 2010

Going to College...1970,1980,1990, 2000 and 2010

Did not start college in either of these years but I did go in the '70's. As we enter the fifth decade since 1970, just wanted to give a little insight on how quickly things change and the remarkable advances we've made in forty years.

In 1970 the rising college co-ed started her classes neatly dressed in a skirt, blouse, hose and loafers. Sure people were wearing jeans and T-shirts then but college dress codes were still implemented. She took notebooks, pens and pencils. Her most sophisticated educational aid was a slide rule. If she was lucky, she had an Instamatic camera but more than likely had one with film that took weeks to process. She possibly had a fridge in her dorm room and maybe, a B&W TV. Her music came from a record player. Turntables were not the norm then.

Since she began her second semester of HS earlier in the year she had seen the debut of "All My Children", the massacre of the McDonald family at Ft. Bragg, NC and the "Beatles" disband. She knew that Apollo 13's oxygen tank exploded, that the US invaded Cambodia and of the horror at Kent State. The president was Richard Nixon and in the summer of 1970 he signed a measure lowering the voting age to eighteen.

"Patton" won the Academy Award in 1970. The top songs were "Bridge Over Troubled Water", James Taylor's "Fire & Rain", "Let It Be" and Black Sabbath's "Paranoid". Top TV shows were "Marcus Welby MD", "Mod Squad" and "Mannix". Our girl of 1970 may have secretly watched the "Brady Bunch". She was excited about the car of the year, the AMC Gremlin. She did not know about "Saturday Night Live". This co-ed is almost 60 years old.

In 1980 the rising college freshman more than likely completely dressed in jeans, but still wore a dress and panty hose on special days. She was armed with a calculator now and had a cassette player or a Sony Walkman. Her camera was more sophisticated but her film still took days to be processed. Her dorm room, if she was lucky, had a color TV that weighed a ton and a microwave.

During her Senior year of HS American Hostages were still held in Iran. Jimmy Carter, the president of her year signed legislation approving a 1.5 million dollar bailout for Chrysler. Israel and Egypt established diplomatic relations and the US boycotted the Moscow Olympics. Ronald Reagan was nominated as a candidate for President.

Pac Man and CNN were launched. The best motion picture of her year was "Kramer Vs Kramer". Her TV shows were "Lou Grant", "Taxi", "Mash" and "Soap". The Broadway musical "Grease" closed making it the longest running musical of all time. Nissan was still Datsun. Eddie Murphy had not yet been on "Saturday Night Live" . This co-ed is almost fifty years old.

In 1990 our girl had "big hair" as perms were all that. When she dressed up there were more than likely shoulder pads involved. Her main outfits consisted of jeans and when she went to football games she dressed for comfort. She could have possibly had a car or bag phone and more than likely came from a home where there was a computer and was somewhat familiar with them. Her camera still had film.

She saw the first African American governor elected in Virginia. Iraq invaded Kuwait and the Gulf War began. The first McDonald's opened in Moscow and the President was George Bush but for most of her life her President was Ronald Reagan.

"Wind Beneath My Wings" by Bette Midler was the song of the year. Country music was becoming more mainstream. "Driving Miss Daisy" won the Academy Award this year and her favorite movie was "Pretty Woman". TV consisted of "Cosby", "Cheers", "LA Law" and the "Wonder Years". She knew of Mike Myers and "Wayne's World on SNL. This girl is almost forty.

In 2000, the co-ed survived the new millennium. The way she dressed had no set pattern, but you can bet some of her clothes came from the Gap or Abercrombie & Fitch. She went to school with a desk top computer, color TV, microwave and a cell phone. "You Got Mail" had nothing to do with paper in a mailbox. She may have had a digital camera.

The World Trade Center still stood in New York. She knew exactly what Bill and Monica were doing in the Oval Office. Bill Clinton had been President for most of her life. She knew the next time it would be Bush or Gore. She listened to the saga of Elian Gonzalez and saw the last publication of "Peanuts".

"American Beauty" was the best picture of the year. She probably enjoyed "What Women Want" and "Meet the Parents". Carlos Santana, Rob Thomas dominated the Grammys with "Smooth". Christina Aquilera was voted "Best New Artist" and her fellow Mouseketeer Britney sang "Oops...I Did It Again". She had a portable CD player and not yet heard of an IPOD.

The girl of 2000's TV consisted of "Friends", "ER" and "Sex and the City". "Saturday Night Live" was twenty five years old. She is almost 30.

Today's rising college freshman 2010 has perfect teeth, a style of her own and she loves to show her toned belly. She thinks that panty hose are something her mother wore. As she goes to school she will have a lap top and a microwave. She will more than likely have a device called an I-Something that provides her with a phone, camera, music and access to everything on the Internet which is smaller than her hand.

Her TV can also be carried in one hand, the larger ones will take two. Her favorite TV shows are the reality ones as her choices go far beyond network. Her music is eccletic and spans many tastes. She is the first of all of the above to know Michael as "The Late" Michael Jackson.

"The Blind Side" is a favorite movie and she loves Sandra Bullock for that and the fact she survived a cheating husband. She has seen a lot of great men cheat on their wives this year. She has seen the fall of Tiger.

She has also seen the fall of the World Trade Center, horrific natural disasters and her President is the first of African American descent. She has written few checks if any and her only handwritten correspondence is a Thank You note which is probably printed. She is almost 20 years old.

Can't even image what our girl of 2020 will have. Just hope the advances are as great as they have been.

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

To Tip or Not to Tip.

In my late teens and early twenties I was a waitress during summers to make money for college and support my husband's continuing education. I loved every position I ever had from steak houses to some very high end restaurants. The money was great and the people I worked with became life long friends.

Never worked so hard in my life but my flair for organization and totally loving to be around people were recognized then. I had what it took. Greensboro in the '70's was the time of ACC Tournaments, The Greater Greensboro Open and the Furniture Market. Events that are still with us, names changed a little in some cases. During this time you knew that there was some tremdous amount of cash to be made and you had to be on your toes. I met so many famous and important people while I was just a girl and prided myself on the service I gave them. My greatest disappoinment during these years was waiting on a golfer and his group while they were at the GGO. I gave them great service, liked them and was sure they liked me. As the evening ended I was rewarded with a $3 tip on a $500 bill. Will not give the full name of the famous golfer, but his first name was Fuzzy.

I even worked in a restaurant in Raleigh on that night in February 1979 when North Carolina got liquor by the drink. The hard work, excitement and the padded pocket book of that night will never be forgotten.

It has been over thirty years since I last waited on a table but have never lost respect for the work that people in restaurants do. I am the first to point out that bad service should not be totally blamed on the person who stands in front of you to take your order. Funny thing that years later in a sales career I faced the same issues when something behind the scenes messed up an order and since I was the only face the customer saw, I took the blame. I have worked in restaurants where the cooks/chefs may have partied too much before coming to work, prep people chose not to come in at all or even fellow servers. However, the show must go on and those who appeared had to work that much harder, many times it was a disaster and others it miraculously fell into place.

Today, as a customer, I am aware of what can go wrong and am much more patient than those dining with me. However, there are things that irritate me: 1. Don't tell me that the chef is drunk or how short staffed you are, say I'm sorry and give me something free as I am being nice. 2. Be pleasant, but unless I ask to hear it, do not tell me your life story when I am enjoying a dinner with family or friends. 3. Be on the ball, keep glasses filled and whisk trash away.

I've heard that in these tough economic times that when people go out to eat they save money by cutting down on the amount of tip they leave. So wrong. These people are hurting too. Another fact is that if paying a bill by credit or debit card and including a tip may result in the restaurant taking part of it to pay for processing fees. Always try to leave a cash tip.

Of course, tipping goes far beyond those who serve you in restaurants. I remember my Mother always giving change to the guy who put groceries in our car. I remember the first time someone told me that they left change in a motel room for the maids after their night's stay. I learned years ago that the person who cut my hair or did my nails deserved extra money when I had just spent a fortune for their services. When I began to business travel I learned that everyone who touched my bag was to get a tip. It has only been in recent years that I realized that the people who delivered furniture and appliances to my home deserved a gratuity when we had just spent a bundle on delivery costs.

Then there are the Christmas gifts. Our newspaper carrier sends us a letter reminding us of his name each year and he gets a gift card as our paper is on our driveway hours before we wake up. Then there are the letter carriers who have to break stride in their routes to bring to the door something we ordered that will not fit in the mailbox. We pay to have our trash picked up and me, the ultimate anti-clutter person creates sometimes a lot more than fits into our alloted can. They all deserve a tip. A gift card at Christmas is such a small thing to do.

All of the above situations are ones where I've slid into the tipping comfort zone. When I order food from a counter, take it to the table and clean up my mess. Why when I sign my purchase receipt is there a spot to add tip? Sure anyone who delivers pizza to your door deserves a tip, but when I pick one up, why am I made to feel like I should tip then too?

Fact is a tip is deserved to those who you feel go far beyond what is expected of them.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Back To School

Just realized today that this is the first August since 1990 that I don't have a child who is going back to school in a couple of weeks. How I miss this. I consider Office Depot and Staples two of my favorite stores and each year when we got our supply lists for the coming year, the kids and I were the first ones in the door. No expense was spared. My children had the very best notebook paper, crayons and pencils money could buy.

After getting bored with summer somewhat we eagerly awaited the notification of who their new teacher would be and what we would have to buy. In the early years there were boxes of tissues, hand soap, crayons, safety scissors and a rest mat. Buying all this was quite a thrill for me but I could not wait to get into the real stuff....notebooks, composition books, rulers and glue sticks. Alas, it came all too quickly and I can honestly say I loved every minute of it. Did not even mention the new shoes and outfits that completed the process, plus, the greatest book bags?

In the middle and HS school years the experience, though still as much fun, the expense of it all mounted. There were many different classes that required the same amount of items for each one. Elementary school times five. Plus, this was the time of the required $129 calculator. I no longer picked out the clothing and shoes as the kids had their own tastes and in these years, there was the beginning of peer presure with apparel desires and price tags far exceeding anything my husband or I bought for ourselves. These were the times of piano, ballet, soccer, karate and all the other passions that had their own costs. We are blessed that we had the resources to be able to give our children these things and I will continue to help those who don't.

While these children were in middle and HS and we were buying all the necessary equipment in the back of our minds loomed college and the real budget buster. For the planners there were dilligent savings plans and for the blessed there were substantial schlorships. We had a little of both and it was going to be ok.

Didn't once in these years think of the extra long twin sheets, bed risers, towels, televisions and computers needed to create our babies' homes away from home. This was addition to the school supplies. College expense goes far past tuition, room and board and books.

Again, we were blessed. Our children were smart and sensitive enough to know of our sacrifices. They paid us back by graduating with honors in just four years and have gone on to become successful adults. There is something to be said about buying school supplies.

Monday, August 2, 2010

Weddings

Although I know that many women will deny this, I think the girls are always a sucker for a wedding. The first weddings I can remember attending were those of my uncles when I was not yet ten years old. Everyone was happy, and the brides looked like to princesses to me. It was not until my late teens that I got to participate in a wedding. It was the wedding of my beloved aunt, eight years older than me, it was 1972 and the man she married is today a special uncle. My bridesmaid's dress was a mint green dotted Swiss and I thought it was so beautiful. So much so that several months later I wore it to my SR prom and it is packed away to this day in my attic.

Then came the weddings of friends and more special dresses. I never came close to "27 Dresses", but I have saved them all. I'm a complete anti-clutter person but these parts of my life are taking up space. Even when I didn't have a main role in a wedding I can remember the the care I took in finding the right dress to cut the cake or register guests.

I remember the weddings of the daughters of our Presidents. Lucy and Lynda. In 1971when Tricia Nixon got married I can hear my then teen aged friends commenting on how their father's wished they could they could give them a wedding like that one. Fact is until seeing these weddings, I thought they were all in churches with a reception in the fellowship hall. A cake, nuts, mints and punch were served and they were all fabulous. My own was even like that. It was not until a friend married a woman from Long Island in the late 70's that I ever went to a wedding with a sit down dinner, a band and alcohol. It was in the late 70's that I first went to an outdoor wedding where the bride had flowers in her hair. I came to realize that wedding options were limitless.

In the getting close to 40 years since my own wedding, I can honestly say that I have attended at least a hundred weddings. Many simple, traditional and lavish, I never left one of them saying "That wedding sucked".

I applaud all the brides for striving to make their wedding days as special as them. Oh sure there were and forever will be, the trends. We've gone from throwing rice (bad for the birds) to bubbles. It has a been a long since I've seen the newlyweds drive away in a car with a "Just Married" sign or tin cans strung along the rear. Can't even remember when I've seen such car in passing. Today exits are much more sophisticated with the limos to carry them the first miles to their wedding night before they jet away to an exotic location. We are so polished now!

In my day (gasp, that makes me sound like a fossil) wedding invitations were purchased from stationery stores. They were engraved in a lavish font and pretty much had the same wording. The names, times and places only changed. You had choices of colors white or ivory. I am proud to say that in 1977 I was one of the first to include my future in-laws names on our invites. Since then the options became more creative and with the advent of the computer the individuality of the bride continued to soar. Through the years I have seen some of the most beautiful and creative invitations, but I still find the old school ones the most elegant.

Wedding dresses continue to be white or ivory for the most part. Today it is unlikely that you will see a bride without a strapless gown or her hair pulled up in a flattering way. In the eighties most brides wore floppy lace hats with long curly hair underneath. I kind of think that the bride styles of the '70's and '90's were not as structured and they were the times of "anything goes". I have never seen a bride who wasn't beautiful.

In our sophisticated times weddings have become certainly more expensive. Think of the days of nuts, mints, cake and punch and how that was fine. Brides and bridesmaid dresses cost less than a hundred dollars. Shoes were dyed to match each dress. In this day shoes do not necessarily need to match and bridesmaids can sometimes pick their own dresses. There are the Bridezillas who demand that their attendants lose weight, get a tan or be at their beckon call through the process.

Destination weddings have become quite the rage in recent years. I do understand that the wedding is about the couple who are about to commit to a life together and doing this in a beautiful and exotic place is enticing. However, I can't image getting married without loved ones who would not have the physical and financial resources to get them there.

I look forward to seeing the wedding trends to come. As my "Friend" Monica once said it...."What little girl does not put and pillowcase on her head and pretend she is a bride"?